My son Jacob, now 5 months old, was sleeping 12 hours beautiful hours a night. Then out of the blue one day he started waking around 5 or 6 am with a poopy diaper. I didn't think too much of it at the time because he had recently gotten some kind of stomach virus and was pooping more often. I don't think most kids will start pooping at night if they come down with a mild stomach bug, but my little jacob has, for whatever reason, had a hard time regulating his poop in regards to night and day. Anywho, this went on for a while and I wasn't too worried about it because he still wasn't completely well. But after some WEEKS of it I decided that I was sick and tired of waking up to a poopie diaper (and half the time a diaper blowout) at 5 freaking am. Who wouldn't be? Time to take some action. I had, assuming things would improve on their own, procrastinated doing something about this long enough.
So what to do? I decided The Baby Whispere's Wake To Sleep method was a good first thing to try. Minimal work and distress for me and baby. I often like to start with the approach that seems the easiest first and will move onto more aggressive approaches as needed.
The first night I woke him at 3:30 by turning on his lights. He is a light sleeper(bah humbug)and this is all it took to wake him up. I quickly turned off the lights and left the room. The next morning I was awakened at 6:55 to his talking. Can't complain. The next night I did the same thing and he woke up at 7:25. Same thing happened the next day. I did this one more night then decided to see what would happen if I didn't wake him in the middle of the night. Ahhh, no more 5am messy wake ups! That is all it took. Lucky me.
Related Post:
Wake to Sleep
So what to do? I decided The Baby Whispere's Wake To Sleep method was a good first thing to try. Minimal work and distress for me and baby. I often like to start with the approach that seems the easiest first and will move onto more aggressive approaches as needed.
The first night I woke him at 3:30 by turning on his lights. He is a light sleeper(bah humbug)and this is all it took to wake him up. I quickly turned off the lights and left the room. The next morning I was awakened at 6:55 to his talking. Can't complain. The next night I did the same thing and he woke up at 7:25. Same thing happened the next day. I did this one more night then decided to see what would happen if I didn't wake him in the middle of the night. Ahhh, no more 5am messy wake ups! That is all it took. Lucky me.
Related Post:
Wake to Sleep
This is great. I am struggling w/my almost 5 mo old baby girl waking up @ 5-6am "talking" but mostly whining & whimpering for up to 40 min before going back to sleep until 7-7:30. Do you think this method would work for this? Even though she's not crying I can't sleep while she's up.
ReplyDeleteDawn,
ReplyDeleteIt is worth trying. I would also make sure she is getting a good amount of daytime sleep, not too much and not too little (if you can help it). And double check that she is getting a good amount of food. Sometimes waking at this age is just a phase though.
Thanks. Hope you don't mind if I ask one more. She was stuck in 45 min naps for a while & once I extended her wake time they have gotten much better (3 1.5 hr naps). However, she does seem crankier now. I'm not sure what to do. Also, if she has dropped her 4th nap should I be putting her to bed earlier? I'm a little nervous to do this w/the whole waking up at 5-6. (Ok that's 2 questions, sorry).
ReplyDeleteThanks for the story! I also have a question. My daughter is 2 months old, and lately she has only needed one dreamfeed per night, which is usually around 12:30. However, even though she doesn't seem hungry again until around 6 or 7 after that, she always, without fail, wakes up again exactly 3 hours after she fell asleep the last time. She wakes really grouchy and sleepy and never eats more than 5 minutes if I try to feed her. So it's obvious she would rather stay asleep but can't for some reason. Then forevermore after that she only goes 45 minute stretches until morning, as if she is uncomfortable somehow. The past 4 or 5 days we have gone to sit by her crib and pat her the minute she stirs at the 3 hour mark, and usually that gets her to go until around 6, but only with our help. Do you think it would be better to try waking her as you did, or should we just continue as we are doing in hopes that she will eventually be able to make it through on her own? Thanks!
ReplyDeleteDawn,
ReplyDeleteSometimes it will take several days, even a few weeks, for kids to get used to a new waketime. Sometimes they need it, but it doesn't come easily. That might be going on. If it has been a long time since you have had the new wake time, maybe decrease waketime by a very small amount of time and see what happens--do naps suffer, does mood improve? I would go from there and see if you can find a sweet spot that works.
If you drop a nap, I would definitely do an earlier bedtime. Newborns do need to be bed so many hours before they wake at night, but when babies get older it isn't as closely connected (assuming you have gotten them used to sleeping through the night and not eating every hour or something which is a habit of it's own rather than a need for food) and they get better at waking at a normal wake time instead of just going X amount of hours without food at night. But you do still have to be careful to make sure they are getting what they need during the day so they won't need to wake at night to fit in feeds. Did that make sense?
Alainapaina,
ReplyDeleteOften if you help baby go back to sleep like you are doing when she stirs she will grow out of the habit on her own. But not always. Sometimes you just end up doing it for what seems like forever! So I would keep giving it a good try if you have just started it, but if weeks have gone by, maybe consider trying something else, like the wake to sleep method I did. Also, moving around the df time sometimes helps with night time issues. Weird but true! So maybe try that too if other things don't work. Good luck!
Thanks a lot! After about 3 days she was back to her happy self. She will be 5 months on Fri & is now awake for 2 hours and seems to finally have gotten past the 45 min issue (mostly). However, now she is only napping 1hr to 1hr & 20mins. I'm worried that she is getting less sleep during the day & technically I am still on a 3hr schedule! However, she is not at all interested in eating every 3 hrs. Seems like I can't catch a break!!
ReplyDeleteDawn,
ReplyDeleteSometimes I will mess around with the "normal" routine for a while when baby is off. For example, try to see what happens if you feed after 3.5 hours rather than 3 hours, even if there is a short nap. Sometime this will help extend things out. Another things I have done once kids have gotten to an age when they are no longer hungry at 3 or 3.5 hours is I'll let them do their own things for a few days. see how long they want to sleep at certain times (while trying to encourage long naps still) and go without eating(within reason during the day). I recently did this with my 5 month old Jacob. Over four days time he extended himself out to a 4 hour routine (sometimes a bit less in the am) by himself. And we never looked back. A little unconventional but I have found this to work on more than one baby and I like to try and see what baby is capable of and what his natural rhythm is and then work around that.
Also, maybe try cutting back on wt like 15 minutes to see if that helps. Maybe only in the first two naps of the day since wt is usually shorter then. Good luck!
Yeah, Rachel! How easy was that!
ReplyDeleteSharon,
ReplyDeleteI know. Jacob is much easier when it comes to sleep than Joshua ever was. Joshua probably would have taken at least 2 weeks to show progress.
Hey Rachel, since my daughter is the same age as Jacob, I'm hoping you can offer me some insight. Vivian has been sleeping 12 hours a night for a while also. For Thanksgiving we spent a week in California and she adjusted immediately to that time zone and since then has been waking up at 5 a.m. back home (Chicago). At first I attributed it to the time change, then I began attributing it to needing more calories during the day so I started feeding her more often during the day and at 5 a.m. when she woke up. Now I'm realizing that it's become a bad habit. I am not ready to start her on solids yet, but I still want her to sleep through the night in her crib. Is that possible? Any suggestions?
ReplyDeleteThanks so much... I'm losing it a little bit.
Darcy,
ReplyDeleteFirst off, some experts say that babies can go 12 hours at night without eating at this age, even if they are not on solids. Some experts suggest continuing a dream feed until solids are well stablished like at 7-8 months. I've talked to my pediatrician about this same thing to see what he has noticed with his patients. He has noticed that most babies are fine going 12 hours without food at this age (with no solids and plenty of day time food) and that most should are fine going 12 hours at night during a growth spurt at this age too. I agree with this. The tricky thing is the word "most" in there. I can't guarantee every baby can do this. So trying to force it might be a battle you can't even win kwim?
The other issue to look at, outside of eating, is an early waking habit. Sometimes the early waking happens because baby is used to eating at this time, and sometimes it happens for various other reason that you may or may not be able to do something for (see the early morning waking post under the index). My oldest son Joshua woke up around 5 or 6 am for a while. He wasn't hungry then, but he just woke up for who knows why. I tried a bunch of different things to get him to stop waking then but they didn't work. But then one day he suddenly stopped waking early. Sometimes time is all that you need.
To answer your question about whether it is possibly for her to sleep through the night, I'd have to say probably. If you work on dropping the feeding first, even if she is awake and you can't get her to sleep then, she'll very likely stop waking when she gets out of the eating habit. But the situation might be like it was for my son above once you drop the eating. It is a common issue that parents have for a few weeks or months. My son Jacob usually sleeps around 12 hours a night now. But not always. He has gone back and forth which has been the case with his sleeping since he was born. He'll sleep 12 hours for three nights, then wake up hungry at 5 one night, then sleep 12 hours another three nights. If he had been my first I probably would have left him in his bed until close to wake up time with the thought that if he can sleep 12 hours most nights, he can do it every night. I was much more strict then. But I am more relaxed now. And my son Jacob is a more relaxed baby. If I feed him one night, that doesn't mean he will wake up to eat then in the future. If it did, I would change how I do things. So, I usually just feed him. I figure, he's close to 20 lbs, isn't on solid foods yet, doesn't have a bad waking habit and MIGHT actually need the extra feeding so I'll just give it to him and save myself from days or weeks or work trying to get him to stop waking to eat at 5 am every so often. It is just easier for us both that way. I know, I don't always follow my own advice :). This is just what makes the most sense in our situation and what I am happiest doing. With my son Joshua I was stressed when he woke up early and didn't end up being able to sleep myself because he would talk most of the time but sometimes whine. With my son Jacob I am relaxed and going more with the flow, within reason of course! If he keeps up his wakings when solids are well underway I will help him drop the feeding for good.
Thanks Rachel. Since I wrote this question, Vivian's sleeping habits have become even more erratic. I think it might be time for some official sleep training. It's a tough time of year for that though. We have a lot going on (visitors, travel etc). I might be lazy and wait until after the holidays. In the meantime, though, I'm losing sleep every night. Oh well... I'm sure we'll get through this.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your insights. I appreciate the time you take to answer our questions!
Darcy,
ReplyDeleteYou might also want to consider whether it is wonder week time. Sometimes things are a little erratic for a couple weeks during that time. It's something like 25 or 26 weeks. I wonder if teeth are an issue too if things are getting really crazy.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMegan McPeak Davis,
ReplyDeleteMaybe try the wake to sleep for the 4/4:30 waking. This might be enough to stop the pooping and early morning waking pattern.
Dear Rachel,
ReplyDeletei am desperate and suffering from not sleeping because of my 5 month old boy.
Since i have learned him 2 weeks ago not to wake up for feeding during the night as during the day he gets enough food, he started to wake at 6 am, not asking for food, but seems like he started his day. While i was breastfeeding he was waking around 7 am (dreamfeeding around 10:30 pm+twice (2 am,4:40 or 5 am) over the night.
I tried to use the wake up method, but seems like i am doing it wrong or it simply does not work with him. I was waking him at 5am, but again, he slept only till 6 am. As next last night i tried to wake him at 4:30, and although i did not hear him at 6amthat he is awake until 7am, at 8 am he started yawning and i could see from his eyes he is sleepy, probably he was laying in the bed and being calm for an hour.At 8:30am i took him to a bed (he slept away, but i expect him to be awake very soon, because probably the wake time was too long for him). I am trying to keep a 4 hour schedule with him and based on the whisperer (T. Hogg) the feedings are at 7, 11, 15, 19 and 22:30 dreamfeeding. Since he wakes up at 6 am, i do not know what to do, as he does not ask for the food at 6 and i am not taking him out of the bed, hoping he will sleep an hour longer.
How properly to apply wake up method? I used to get in to his room one hour earlier and shake him a bit, or even turn on the light and he opened his eyes, then i turned off the light and walked out. This i repeated 4 days in a row, then i tried 1,5 hour earlier to wake him as you did with your son, but seems he was awake again at 6, as this happend this morning and at 8am he was yawning.
What would you do in my place to extend his wakeup time in the morning.
He usually sleeps 1-1,5 hours in the mornings (between 8:30-10, and 13-15) and about 45 minutes between 5-6pm.If he would not sleep there he could not be awake till 7:30pm when he is placed into his bed for sleep.
Any advice would help me :(
I feel like an idiot as, i am not sleeping during the nights (3-4 hours altogether, as i am nervous that he will be awake again at 6 and i do not know how i will handle the sleepings during the day :(
GK,
ReplyDeleteMake sure to look at the early morning waking post in the index. It will help you do some problem solving.
When you have night feeds, it isn't uncommon for the morning wake time to be a bit later than wihtout the night feeds.
Wake to sleep doesn't work for all babies. And with some it takes 5-7 days.
Some babies will wake early in the morning no matter what. I usualy like to start the morning waketime at a reasonable time (as in actually get baby from his bed and up for the day) adn then put them to bed a little bit earlier than usual for their first nap at this age.
I think your expected waketimes may be a bit long (but, maybe not, every baby is different). Babies around this age usually can't do much mroe than 2 hours, often 1.5 in the am.
An earlier bedtime may help.
You shouldn't feel like an idot at all. Many moms go through what you are going through. Just make a plan of what you want to do with the wakings and stick to it. I would probably try to minimalize attention if you can in the am since he may continue to wake to have you go in to him.
Good luck,
Rachel
I enjoyed your post and wonder if you can help...20 month old Natalie is my 4th and I homeschool so we are usually home. She used to take 2 45 minute or 1:30 minute naps. However, now that she is down to 1 nap she is only sleeping 45 min and is so fussy. She has had the same routine for nap and bed since she was about 6 months old, except bath only at bed. We read 3-4 books, white noise, lamp off, sing song and put her down awake. I am at my wits end because I know she needs more sleep! Do you have any suggestions!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your post and wonder if you can help...20 month old Natalie is my 4th and I homeschool so we are usually home. She used to take 2 45 minute or 1:30 minute naps. However, now that she is down to 1 nap she is only sleeping 45 min and is so fussy. She has had the same routine for nap and bed since she was about 6 months old, except bath only at bed. We read 3-4 books, white noise, lamp off, sing song and put her down awake. I am at my wits end because I know she needs more sleep! Do you have any suggestions!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your post and wonder if you can help...20 month old Natalie is my 4th and I homeschool so we are usually home. She used to take 2 45 minute or 1:30 minute naps. However, now that she is down to 1 nap she is only sleeping 45 min and is so fussy. She has had the same routine for nap and bed since she was about 6 months old, except bath only at bed. We read 3-4 books, white noise, lamp off, sing song and put her down awake. I am at my wits end because I know she needs more sleep! Do you have any suggestions!
ReplyDeletemambowland,
ReplyDeleteMy guess is that she is overtired. Try an earlier nap time to see if it extends out the nap. Try a very early bedtime to help get over the overtiredness. Once she gets over some extreme overtiredness, continue with an early, but not quite soo early, bedtime.
I am planning on homeschooling too. Maybe I'll be running to you with questions soon :)
Rachel
My son is 9 mths old and ECB. He does take a little of solids occasionally (pears & peas). He is a pretty good night sleeper although he has his moments with teething and belly troubles. We have been traveling with him for my hubbys work since he is 6 weeks old. I try to keep our trips to every 6 weeks for 1 week. Change is hard for babies even my 3 year old. Anyways his naps have become a complete nightmare.
ReplyDeleteHis schedule:
6:30 wake & BF
9:30 BF
10:30 nap ( was an hour) but lately we are lucky of he sleeps 10 min
12:30or 1 BF
2:00 nap was sleeping an hour and a half but lately not sleeping at all
4ish BF
5iah a couple of bites o pears or peas or mum mum with water. We all have dinner at this time
7:30 BF bath and bed
I should mention i put him in bed awake for naps and bedtime. He has been screaming for naps. I watch for his sleepy sighns. I feel so awful because he isn't napping well he gets extremely fussy and makes all of us miserable. I've taken him to the dr and red out any underlying issues.
Haley,
DeleteThat would be exhausting! Traveling with two little ones and not getting much sleep! My guess is that he is overtired. You won't be able to get very far with sleep if you are dealing with that issue. I'd start off by considering a reduction in his wake time. My guess is the this overtired signs are overtired signs. I would try to work by the clock a bit more at this age--most parents I talk to seem to have more luck with this. You still pay attention to how your child acts (before and after the nap) and how they nap to determine when they should nap, but you want to really watch those wake times.
http://www.mybabysleepguide.com/2009/02/wake-time.html
I would also do an early bedtime. This will probably have a bit impact. Just move it slowly earlier. Well, you might be able to do it suddenly a lot earlier, but some kids will treat it as a nap. Look over this post for other suggestions. Good luck. Let me know if you have other questions.
http://www.mybabysleepguide.com/2010/02/top-sleep-tips-for-children.html
Rachel